How to Pray for Your Enemies

“But I say unto you, Love your enemies, bless them that curse you, do good to them that hate you, and pray for them which despitefully use you, and persecute you; That ye may be the children of your Father which is in heaven: for he maketh his sun to rise on the evil and on the good, and sendeth rain on the just and on the unjust. For if ye love them which love you, what reward have ye? do not even the publicans the same? And if ye salute your brethren only, what do ye more than others? do not even the publicans so? Be ye therefore perfect, even as your Father which is in heaven is perfect.”

Matthew 5:44-48

This passage is far easier said than done, but over the years I’ve found that one of the best ways to let go of anger or bitterness toward someone is not just to pray to God for Him to take these things away, but to also pray for the one that has caused the hurt.

Quick Prayers Won’t Cut It

A simple 5-second, “Dear God, please bless [insert person’s name], Amen,” wasn’t what Jesus meant in Matthew 5:44. The verb for love in this passage is “agape” which means the self-sacrificing love that wants the best for someone else—the same as we would want for ourselves. This is the same verb that appears in John 3:16 “For God so loved the world…”. If we are supposed to love our enemies in the same way that “God so loved the world”, then, let’s face it, 5-second prayers really aren’t going to cut it.

Love. Bless. Do good. Pray.

Yes, this is tough, I’m not going to gloss it over. That repulsive, prickly feeling in your chest. The knife-cut through your heart. The ache in the pit of your stomach. The memories of angry words hurled at you in the heat of the moment. The tears. Oh, yes, the tears.

“That ye may be the children of your Father which is in heaven:”

What it Means to Bear God’s Name

A name is associated with character in the Bible, so when Jesus talks about us being children of God it really comes down to bearing the name of the Lord. It also goes hand-in-hand with the 3rd commandment “Thou shalt not take the name of the Lord thy God in vain;” (Exodus 20:7). When Jesus was suffering on the cross, what was He saying? “Father, forgive them; for they know not what they do.”

Even in the profound agony of the moment, He was praying for His enemies.

Jesus came to this imperfect, sin-soaked earth to show us what God’s character of love is like—even in the midst of pain and suffering beyond comprehension. No wonder Peter proclaimed, “Neither is there salvation in any other: for there is none other name under heaven given among men, whereby we must be saved.” (Acts 4:12)

Of course, praying for our enemies isn’t a means to salvation—we can never earn a place in heaven by our works; this is instead the evidence of God working in our hearts, sanctifying, and transforming our character through the power of His Holy Spirit.

When we can see others as God sees them—precious sons or daughters that Jesus died to save—we will begin to understand, and experience that Agape love that Jesus describes in our text today.

Heartfelt Prayers for Your Enemies, An Example

If you’re not sure where to start, you can use the following as a template. I recommend that you pray daily for these people. (See my notes just before paragraph 2 for some clarification.) Click the links to go to Bible verses that are relevant to the statement.

“Father, God,

Thank you for being the great God that hears, and who is interested in the things that affect Your children. I ask that you would cover me with the blood of Jesus, because it is by His righteousness, and sacrifice alone that I am able to come boldly before your throne of grace.

(If you have prayed this prayer for an individual more than once, you don’t need to keep asking God’s forgiveness for your part in the relationship’s breakdown. If you are sincere, He forgives you the first time and doesn’t look back. Skip the following paragraph and move on to the next one.)

You know how badly I’ve been hurt by the actions of _______” I don’t understand (or I struggle to accept) the reasons for why things are the way they are in this relationship, but, as Your child, I trust that You hold my heart, and my hurts, and that you will work this situation out for my good, and _______’s as well. I pray that You would forgive me for my part in the breakdown of this relationship, and that you would provide a way of reconciliation so that Your name may be glorified.

I bring _______ to You today. You know the struggles they are facing. You know we are flesh and blood, and how the enemy, Satan uses our weaknesses to hurt and break down those around us. I am praying that You would place a hedge of protection around _______ and each of their family members today [name names if you know them] and keep them safe from the attacks of Satan.

Please send your Holy Spirit to speak to their heart and draw them to your truth. Please place people in their path who would be the evidence of Your love and goodness. Give them discernment to overcome every deception, and give them the desire to hunger and thirst after Your righteousness.

Help _______ to seek You in all that they do today, so that they may be filled with Your joy and peace. Prepare their hearts to fully accept Jesus so that they may be saved, and be ready to go to heaven when He comes again.

I pray these things in the name of Jesus, knowing that Your ways are higher than ours. Thank you for hearing and answering according to Your will.

Amen”

Seeking after God and submitting our wills as a living sacrifice is something we need to do in all areas of our lives—especially in the areas where we have experienced the greatest pain. It is only through the power of the Holy Spirit that we can even start to think about praying for our enemies. I pray that God will send His Spirit to work this process out to be a blessing to you, and that you will experience His healing as you pray for those who have hurt you.

Kirsten

PS: Do you know someone who would be blessed by this message? Please feel free to share the link so they can be encouraged too!

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